I thought that butterflies in your tummy were supposed to be an exciting feeling? Well, no, not when they are there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week! In fact its bloody annoying, mixed with your pulse pounding down the veins in your neck, and the sweat gathering in the palm of your hand. You’d think I would be describing someone standing in court waiting for a jail sentence wouldn’t you?
This is me everyday! Walking into a shop and ordering a coffee or even ringing up to book to have my nails done!
My loved ones know what I struggle with everyday, but when telling other people, I just find it embarrassing and humiliating, because of the stigma attached to it, it makes me feel like I’m weak and worthless. This needs squashing.
In reality, all the symptoms of anxiety and having panic attacks are harmless, I’ve often felt dizzy and light headed thinking I’m about to faint, my hands and feet go in a spasm and curl up, or when I have aggressive chest pains I think I’m having a heart attack, this may only last a few minutes, but they are the most frightening things to feel at that moment in time.
The other thing that I find terribly embarrassing is that sometimes I can’t stop shaking, and people begin to notice, when handing money over to a cashier, or having my nails done, or holding a cup of coffee, yup there is little old me, hands shaking all over the place, this is even more annoying when wanting to do the perfect flicked eyeliner! The ridiculous thing about this, is that there may not even be anything that’s worrying me that day, but my body is telling a whole different story.
However is it hypocritical of me to say that I do think that many of these mental disorders we have these days are over exaggerated and used to get out of any situation? I believe that mental illnesses are real, I’ve seen it with my own eyes and felt it first hand. Everyone worries right? But is it to the extent where you would rather stay in on a Friday night, rather than going out with the girls just because you don’t want to walk into a bar in heels? Afraid of people looking at you? Even though they probably aren’t, and it is all in your head?
These days there are soooooo many self-help theories that you are urged to try to get over bad anxiety, however this doesn’t mean that you’ll never feel a touch of worry for the rest of your life! I do agree with professionals when they say that you can control anxiety but can’t make it disappear completely, it is just something you have to live with. The most effective solution I have found is exercise, not only are you releasing all these bad feelings inside, but you’re making yourself healthy inside and out in the process, also a long run or a vigorous workout will tire you out, therefore it will make you sleep better at night. It’s a big circle, nothing bad can come out of a bit of yoga in the morning, or a light jog before dinner.
Another way to calm yourself down may be to do breathing exercises, although I find this so hard to do when I’m in the height of a panic attack, it’s so hard to tell yourself to breathe correctly when all you’re thinking is that you are going to faint. Although, now there are so many apps on your smart phone for breathing exercises, they are defiantly worth checking out!
(If you want any other tricks and tips to help you control your anxiety, messaged me and I can give a fill list of all the books I’ve read, and other ways which help me feel better on a regular basis.)
It’s so funny that I actually feel very anxious about publishing this blog for people to see and read, how ironic is that? But the opinion attached to people with bad anxiety problems needs to stop being so negative, it is real, it does stop people like me on a daily basis doing daily errands and activities.
Be attentive, anything could happen to anyone in life to make you anxious all of a sudden, out of nowhere.
Till next time
Love from a very anxious bear 😛