Life is inevitably going to throw stuff at you to fight with.
Break ups? losing jobs? financial issues? We’ve all had our fair share.
More important stuff that happens to us that just SHOULDN’T but unfortunately does, divorce affecting kiddiewinks, losing someone who went way to early, constantly being let down and disrespected.
The last three years with my boyfriend have been challenging, and I’m not talking about our relationship, more about the people around us. Deceitful and obnoxious behavior towards someone we love is harder in some ways than it happening personally to us. Over the last three and a half years I have had an insight to how some people can truly behave, and how there are some very VERY nasty people in this world.
I suppose because I’ve not ‘really’ experienced as bluntly as Cal has before, it’s ended up being harder to digest. And I’ve struggled with it a lot more than Cal has.
I’ve come across a number of ‘odd’ people in my life and I’m only 24. (odd is an understatement), so it surprises me that when I meet another ‘odd’ person, I’m once again baffled.
I’m not naming names, I don’t want too, although it probs isn’t hard to guess if you really know me, and I don’t want to list occasions of extremely weird behavior, but my blogging platform helps me in ways you will never understand till you do it. I suffer massively from anxiety, and I believe truly in self-help. This is my self help.
I’ve met megalomaniacs, narcissists and sociopaths that can truly ruin your life. It’s not fun, it’s not something to just grab attention , it’s real life and they can 100% negativity affect your life in ways you would never imagine.
What’s the point of this blog you might be asking yourself? It’s a huge release of energy. And if you’re reading this, knowing that you’re not an arsehole then you know that you’re not alone in this world surrounded by numpties.
5 GREAT WAYS TO ENCOURAGE YOUR OWN SELF HELP.
Lets talk about it (but not too much)
This is a tricky one, because you don’t want to self obsess. I lost a friendship not long ago and all I did for a LONNNNNNGGG time was talk talk and talk some more about it. And that was no help at all. Because you never catch a break.
You need to talk about it constructively. If you’re upset pick up the phone and call your bestie, get mum over for a cuppa tea. Talk to dad on your hands free. But don’t obsess.
Say how your feeling, and take their advice. If you ring for help and don’t take it, then your just winding yourself up for absolutely nothing.
Find your release
I mentioned earlier how I feel that blogging is my way of helping myself. It took me a while to realise this about blogging. But I’m so happy with what it does for me mentally. Find your version of blogging. Either it being writing thoughts down (see number 4), therapy, taking time to listen to your favourite music, yoga, whatever it is…if it helps, keep doing it.
Do something you LOVVEE
Them moments when we are down in the dumps and we feel the word is against us…I always do something I love, even if that means a glass of prosecco while watching Real Housewives, that 45 minutes of happiness put me in a good mood, even if it’s not for long, it was still 45 minutes that I could have spent fretting over something.
This might be weird but I love washing the pots, I love sorting out my make up and skin care cupboard, putting some washing on, listening to Taylor Swift really realllly loud. Sitting in a coffee shop with my Mac. All these things just take my mind off something bad, even if it’s for a few minutes. It’s worth doing.
Write it all out
This might be very similar to my blogging. However I mean it in a different way. I love writing lists, it helps me organise my thoughts and feelings. Pro’s, Con’s, Do’s, Dont’s. Etc Etc. It’s like taking something from my mind and literally putting it on a piece of paper and leaving it there. I also find that this helps better if I write it physically instead of typing it on a computer.
This is our biggest downfall as human beings, getting into the depth of despair and staying there. Liking the attention of being asked ‘are you okay?’ far too much.. Get up, turn that sad music off..and sort yourself out. Yes! that’s the first and biggest step, you’re half way there after that.
We don’t do ourselves any favours if we are constantly pointing at ourselves in a mirror saying ‘you are sad, be sad!’.
People can put us in sad situations, however it’s only us that are in control of how we feel about that situation.
This is something I tell myself all the time. Get your groove back!